stop commenting on other peoples bodies
Shirt: ministreet: https://www.ministreetkidswear.com/collections/woman-fashion/products/tee-be-kind-cream
Shorts: Thrifted and DIY
The amount of times I have to say this still shocks me. Let’s say it all together folks - Stop commenting on other peoples bodies!! Once and for all!
Recently I have been getting a lot of DM’s and comments telling me that I look like I have been losing weight, with a positive little you go girl behind them. While I acknowledge these comments are coming from a good place, they are still completely in appropriate. I have shared many times that I have Crohn’s Disease, a chronic autoimmune disorder that can be aggravated by stress and in my case that can lead to rapid unhealthy weight loss. I think it goes without saying that we are all in a stressful situation right now, which has led me to having a minor flare up where I may have lost a few pounds.
This is one of the many reasons why it is not okay to comment on other peoples bodies! You never ever know what is going on inside of them. You dont know if their intention is to lose weight, you dont know if they have some underlying illness, or have battled with disordered eating in the past. You never ever know. So pro tip, dont say anything.
When I look back on my times of diets and wanting to make my body smaller, the comments of “you look great, you look like you have lost weight” were like fuel to a fire. They made me eat less, workout more, and become more obsessed with my scale. Those comments were like drugs to me and quickly became what I lived for. I found myself obsessed with the number on the scale and would do anything to get someone to tell me I looked like I was taking up less space.
I also remember when I started to gain weight back after my many unsustainable yo-yo diets ended, the comments also ended. That feeling was worse than my pants not fitting. People stopped telling me I looked good, I could see people questioning why the weight was coming back on, and I could hear the snickers and whispers behind my back commenting on my ever growing ass. I felt insignificant. I felt gross. I felt unworthy.
Looking back on it now I was addicted to people telling me I looked like I was getting smaller, that was my drug and the high I was always searching. I needed that acknowledgement, that praise. That addiction of needing affirmation from others led me to years of unhealthy fat diets and an extremely warped view of myself and my self worth that would take years of extremely hard work to undo.
So let’s recap here, commenting on someones body, weight, weight loss, weight gain is not appropriate. It needs to stop. We are better than comparing someone to a size, we are better than associating someones self worth with a number.